Nowhere

Wednesday, April 30, 2008 |

Love ends, love begins..Might be love for yourself or might be for someone. When you are the one on the other side of the relationship and you are the one left behind, to let go is suicide, to forget was beyond impossible, for some, even to forgive was quite difficult. Ask me about it =D.
But lately i realized that love no matter how great cannot justify the truth, it cant erase the past, love no matter how godly, cannot predict the future. And its but smart to see love as real as it can be. For when you love, you want it happen, not just some fancy. True Love never fade, but love does.
To be honest, its quite sad that i have to learn things the hard way. But i guess its better than not learning at all and be remained trapped in the past i so long to remain existing. "Moving on" have always been one of the most pathetic phrase i believe to be hypocritic in nature. And yet i held on to that until i was out of misery. I was in denial. Was.. It was the past.
Believe me when i say that loosing someone is not as hard. well atleast you experienced being loved..only that, love has to end.
Whats more painful is when love begins, but loving is one sided, although Love is not selfish and true love does not ask for anything in return, some love just needs to be reciprocated. Thats when broken heart begins, even before love happens. Its so depressing to love someone who don't even see your existence or who dont even feel the same. Love spillage, its a waste.. But it is one challenge to get some affection back the least to get a nice good friendship. To make it or break it, they said.. But its all on you. It might be just my illusion or just some weird need to feel important, well ive been through both sides of breakups.. and now im in the middle i know where i want to go but i cant, being prevented by the thought that he sees me only just like a sweet loving friend.
Feels quite the same. But different at the same time. Summary: It Hurts.

Feeling Sick

Sunday, April 27, 2008 |

Im feeling sick and yet im still taking pics.. Im' a certified cam whore ^___^ .. OWNED ! haha

Thoughts

Monday, April 14, 2008 |

If you worry about piling up a bunch of tomorrows,
You'll wind up with a lot of empty yesterdays..


- Ink- Links, Hallmark

Since Patch 810

Sunday, April 13, 2008 |

GMs summon showcase on DOD entrance



Hunting Kings with Elisha and Hector

(Elisha joined LW already)

First Step on Eldeon CF with LastWish


A Visit to Clan Forever Farming for Grade 5



Meet Me Halfway

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The past experiences taught me that to love and be loved is the greatest thing you can experience in your life. If Loving is Giving, then Loving is also Accepting, but you have to meet halfway, otherwise, it is not love.. Either It is Obesession or Slavery, or both..

- mau

A Missing Light

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I just got On.. finallyyyyy!!
Sucks .. grrr
I dont have Net most of the day, im missing the LED signifying that Internet is OK. Yeah i did called the customer service hotline already, but it still frustrating, i got so much to do.
They say to powercycling the modem is the first trouble shooting step.. and yes i did that like a hundred times already.. and since its summer i would have guess maybe its so hot that the IC in the modem melted or sumthing.. ahh i tried to cool it down but it wont, not so quicly, well i put it in freezer, really..
I connected it back cold like a dead mouse as it came from the fridge, sadly, still missing that one LED, well as i get annoyed in each and every outcome of tirelessly turning on and off.. i realized the importance of one line. "One for all, all for one".. Just one light missing and its totally not working. =(

New Family

Monday, April 7, 2008 |

Rewind..

They took me in.

Thanks to amando and lina.
Rewind.
My new family.

I did not go there because they were grade 5 or because of the clan beach (infact i haven't been there yet). Im just really looking for a new clan.

Thanks Rewind for having me..

If there is one important thing that kept me (hira my cleric) with LastWish thats because the people are really nice. Xwe / XThey is one of the coolest CM i've known. I just really have to leave LW for some personal reasons hmm that i can't much elaborate. But, should a chance be given, i would really want xThey to continue LastWish and not sell it or something. Its a clan full of nice and peace loving people.

Well i still dunno which clan will take me in, but I'll do my best, welcome new friends.

On Track

Sunday, April 6, 2008 |

Last night, i received something in my phone i dont really expect, not ever..
Gosh. Am i absurd?
Its a business card with my ExBfs number on it, well it came from the same number, and i dont quite understand why, when i thought that the very last thing he would like to happen is to communicate with me and be a part of my life again.. When we decided to go separate ways last November, ive been constantly telling him that i would like us to be friends in the end, and he refuses that, so was under the impression that he totally want me out of his life.. Well, now that i am over him i can grant that easily, but then, him, being a part of my life for almost 10 years, i guess it cant easily be taken for granted.. now, i believe that its true..True Love does not fade, if theres a need to let go it only changes form, but love is love and no matter what kind of love we talk about, in the end, to love is still to care.
Still i thank God, despite the heartbreak and despite the pain we inflict in each other including our families. I hope we can really be close like how we were 10 years back. like 10 years back... There's no need for romantic love. Remembering and caring is more than enough.
I guess, we're on the right track.

Summer Heat

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Waaaaaaahhh ..
Its so f*cking hot in the Philippines!
Well its summer and its so humid, so bright and so colorful. Haha, Im being retarded LOL , the season is great but unlike other people, i don't quite love summer. I love beaches, i like water, i like space and i like the solemnity of the sea. But summer isn't all about beaches, summer also means .. Super Hot afternoons, high fluctuations of electrical bills due to non stop use of fans and airconditioners and most of all.. more fat and calorie intake due to constant addiction to twin popsies.
Its so horrifying how childish i am, trust me i woke up this morning so frustrated bec ive been walking a long time under the sun sweating and thirsty and having a killer migraine.. When i opened my eyes and see more sunlight touching my forehead from that position in bed, I got even more irritated. Lol , it was just a dream, waaa.. sunlight stalks me bad grrr.... >__<
Well summer is here, and like life itself, seasons change. May summer bring me something good despite how much i want it to end.